I HATE HALO 3

There, I said it. Now before I go any further, let me explain where I am coming from. I used to be a Halo fanatic. I played Halo 2 online as much as possible, bought all the map packs, reached level 26 or 27, could dominate (most of) my friends, and even found many easter eggs within the campaign(the scarab gun was insane).

So you can only imagine how excited I was when I saw the first Halo 3 announcement at E3 2006. By the time summer 07 hit I was counting down the days, and eventually the hours and minutes. I did not buy the legendary version of Halo 3 though. I bought the collectors edition. $130 for a game was just too much money for this frugal gamer.

That is my "halo history" in a nutshell. Now on to the bashfest.

ALERT: POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD!

First off, Halo 3 suffers from lack of innovation and originality. The level design has hardly changed since halo 1 except for some more detail. The campaign levels are all the same. Go blow up something, rescue and defend, or reach the next point so you can kill the big bad salamander or ape. Oh, and you might get a helper, or distraction depending on how you look at it, along the way.

The "new" weapons are not that new. Brute Spike?! Please, just another excuse for the smg.
Spike grenade? Plasma but can stick to walls. Gravity Hammer? Sword but louder. Flamethrower? Other games did that years ago.
Why is it that the aliens and humans seem to have guns that do the exact same things but just happen to have differently colored projectiles? Brute Prowler and Chopper? More like a Warthog and Covenant Ghost. The only gun I somewhat enjoyed was the Spartan Laser because it was new, original, and took some skill to use. Oh and don't even mention
the bubble shield, it just made annoying nwb campers even more annoying.

Kitty Laser = Best weapon evar!


Next, the Halo series has taken the skill out of FPS's (first person shooters). Every gun has a slight auto aim for noobs who don't have enough skill to do jack squat. One clarification: I believe Halo 1 does not have this function. But 2 and 3 do. Just see this video right HERE. BTW I know the video is for halo 2 but the same concept applies to halo 3.

The plot line of Halo 3 seems to have been rushed beyond comprehension. Although there are a few more Earth levels, the whole "Gravemind" thing could have been awesome. But instead it was convoluted, confusing, and it didn't wrap up that well (I still think that was the most retarded way to kill him).

In addition, the plot reused exact halo 1 levels (Assault on the control room and The Maw) towards the end of halo 3. While these levels were fun on Halo 1, I felt ripped off paying money for a rehash. Finally, fighting with the flood is the worst idea I have ever seen. You spend 2.5 games attempting to exterminate a bacteria only for it to suddenly have a change of heart! LAME! Also, the final ending scene of Halo 3 is everything but a final closing sequence. It's just another Micro$oft attempt at a sequel to make more money.

But most importantly, the Halo series have the most annoying and stupid people to ever play an online multiplayer game.
They have no sense of class or respect.

A little trash talk is fine, but these kind of people ( and you know who I am talking about if you have played) are just not fun to play with. Just try having a fun or competitive game while some little 9 year old boy on your team won't shut his whiny trap about how cool he is and how he can beat you. And in addition to this he is constantly in your way shooting you as you try to kill people.

Then there is the other kind of breed. Those teenage boys who think they are all that because they scream obscenities and talk of all kinds of debauchery of which half the other team has never heard before. Where have all the good, kind, respectful, and fun gamers gone? I will tell you. They are all playing the less played games like (GOW before everyone started playing it, Splinter Cell, etc.). The only fun gamers are those over the age of 20, I promise, but there are occasionally some good teens.

Master Chief Sucks at Halo 3 is a perfect example of annoying people.

Now I have talked up a storm of hate, but I will give Halo 3 a few props. First, the Forge is a good editing map that is fun to screw around with. And Bungie worked hard to make this a solid game. Unfortunately, this game was extremely hyped, and did not come close to expectations. Oh well, it's M$, what do you expect?

The only way I will ever play Halo is through a local connection with my friends.


Last but not least, alot of you people are probably thinking: "if he doesn't like Halo 3, then what does he like?"

Well, wouldn't you like to know.



Send any retarded comments or questions to
Danny O'Neal at renegadedufunk@gmail.com